Not Ready

Homesick for rest, for space
Throat a raw yolk, clinging
Nerves, nerves, nerves -
A snide diagnosis?
Will they test my temperature for novelty,
Examine my appetite for challenge?
Laugh into a white pocket,
Or plug me into a white sheet,
Immobile,
To treat Not having what it takes?

Nightmares homesick for bedtime,
The time it takes to climb to the top and gag,
Then rest my head back down.

Homesick for speed,
eyes closed by mindless, relentless wind,
For relief,
For breathing in, holding,
Out, and out, and out.

For the moment after.